Time Out

Joys of flying solo . . .!

by carmenlund on January 30, 2011

Several years ago, I was determined the to go to the movies by myself. It sounds ridiculous that this was a big event for me, but it took me lots of courage to be out in public alone. I was sure I would see people I knew. Would they think I had no friends? How embarrassing that would be?

Nevertheless, I was committed to “trying to go it alone,” just this one time. The theatre I chose was 30 miles away from home which greatly reduced my chances to run into anyone I knew. I bought my ticket, bulked up on candy and popcorn and took a seat in the darkest part of the theatre. I not only survived being alone that first time, but I surprised myself, I loved it. I was free at last!

No longer would I have to wait for others to accompany me. If someone wanted to join me, great, but I was now able to explore by myself. My world expanded since that first “solo trip.” Since that time, I have done lots of things by alone. I have dined, attended concerts and lectures, traveled and explored unfamiliar places alone and even moved to places where I knew no one.

In addition to enjoying these events, I discovered that it was easy to meet people who I never would have encountered if I were with friends.

Now I have a choice to fly solo or in formation. Both scenarios are fun and exciting. I no longer limit my possibilities. I am free to be myself, alone or with others!

What about you?
Have you limited yourself in any way?
What would be the advantage to you if you expanded your experiences?Is there something you would like to try, but have not yet found the courage to do so?

I am including a wonderful short video about ways to be alone which I found wonderful. Enjoy!





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3 Ways to become a friend you would like to have. . .

by carmenlund on October 11, 2010

‎”I will spend more time with myself this lifetime than with anyone else. Let me learn to be the kind of person I would like to have as a friend.”
Anonymous


I am not sure I could honestly tell you, I have been “the kind of person I would like to have as a friend.”

Who would possibly want a friend that is always busy and stressed out and constantly in perpetual motion? I personally hate people like that, and yet, I must admit that much of my life has been about living at breakneck speed with lots of hoops in the air at the same time.

I am really good at “getting it done and quickly moving onto the next,” but quite honestly, living like a whirling dervish has been exhausting not only for me, but for others in my life.

I want to get off the treadmill and stop whizzing through my life.

I want to slow down and become aware of all the possibilities for joyful living right now, instead of “waiting until. . . . ”

I want to experience my life as a marathon rather than the sprint it has been.    In order to make this happen, I need to change and begin to live in a new way.

One big problem is that what others consider, “slowing down,” feels like a “total standstill,” to me.  I am a Type A personality.   I am not at all comfortable with “slow.”  However, I realize I need to make some act in a different way in order to be, not only the friend I would like to have, but the friend I would like to be.

Fortunately for me, there are lots of wise people around willing to teach me how to live more consciously and authentically and none of them recommend going faster.

Normally, I would make a  long list of every possible suggestion I have read or heard that could improve my life.  However, in the effort to live more consciously and a great deal less of overwhelm, I chosen to begin with 3 thoughts followed by ideas as to how I might begin the process to create an more thoughtful and less stressful life for myself:

1.  Stop doing and start being!

~  Begin each day in solitude, taking an hour for quiet, prayer and meditation

~  Stopping to think before I act. Think before I act.

2. Let go of my expectations!

~  Be grateful for the all the things in my life.

~  Deal with what is in my life, rather than what I  might want

3.  Nourish myself

~  Spend time in nature

~  Be open to all sorts of learning

Each of us has different needs and ways to begin to create the life we would like to live.  What is it that you might do to  improve the quality of your life and enable you to become the friend you would like to have?

Good luck, you are surely worth it!






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